Living God has internet meltdown

A video of unemployed carpet cleaner E A [Living God] Koetting is circulating on the worldwide wibble in which he seems rather “tired and emotional.”

The video, which has found its way into the paws of Watcher of the Dawn, appears to have been released after some of his minions dared to question his divinity.

Koetting is shutting down an online group to stop them from debating if he was the Living God he claimed.

As can be seen, he releases a stream of invective, claiming that he was the all-powerful one, but mere mortals were ruining his Divine Plan.

He demanded his followers should “bow down before me" or they “simply will not exist.”

Koetting said: “There is only one mother fucker alive who can do what I can do, and you refuse to recognise that because you have got this ego.”

He denies that he is speaking out of ego but because “he is cursed”. He is the only “motherfucker” who can see past the pettiness and hurt because people are not getting his ideas.

Koetting told his followers that they should stop trying to be something they aren’t and start "following orders."

“If you can’t do that, then go back to painting houses,” the unemployed carpet cleaner cryptically said.

Given that some of his followers consider that “following orders” means carrying out double murders, Koetting could have just moved from being a comedy narcissist to a full-blown cult leader.

It is unclear when the video was leaked or which group it referred to. Koetting was banned from Facebook after the double murders.

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